Sunday, August 17, 2014

I go to church for Jesus, not a hookup



The most amazing woman on the planet had a birthday today
Today is my mother's 74th birthday. Happy birthday, Mom! She is the most beautiful, kind, selfless, funny and interesting person I know. Did you know my grandfather, who I never met, actually delivered her? Some day I will meet my maternal grandfather, though I hope that's not too soon. I seriously don't know what I would do without my parents. They literally rescued me from an abusive marriage and nursed me back to health through intensive chemo treatments. They care for my children, and they are my best friends. I am beyond blessed.

Dating in the Mormon trenches
I'm so excited to report that I found butterflies. This is significant because it's been, like, years since I've felt them with someone new. Who knows if things with this new guy will progress anywhere but the fact that I can feel that anticipation every time I get a phone call or text is a great thing. I'm not emotionally dead, I know I can "feel." I am awakening out of a relationship slumber/stupor and it feels delightful (I chose this cheesy word for a reason).

So another guy I've dated a few times asked me out for Friday night (not Butterfly guy). Let's call him Drake. Drake is cute in a nerdy way and I find him charming. We went bowling and met at the lanes. We checked in and when it came time to pay, the kid working the counter asked if we were paying separately. Drake said yes. Ok... um, so Drake asked me out and the week prior when Drake had joined my friends and I, we paid for his drinks and appetizers. And now I was asked to pay $12.50 towards my bowling? Major turn-off and I was annoyed. Tacky. But as we bowled, I tried to get past it. Afterwards, we went to get frozen yogurt. We got to the counter and mine came to $3.57. Drake waited for me to pay for my yogurt, which I did. At that point, I was done. There would be no fourth date. We sat down and I said I only had 30 minutes because I had to pick up my daughter (not true). Sure enough, time was up and he walked me to my car, gave me a big huge hug and said, "Lizzy, I want to see you again. I really like you."

I smiled. "Awe, thanks, I'll be in touch. Gotta run, drive safely." I got in my car and deleted him as contact. I dated one cheap guy who was way too keen on keeping financial tabs and I'm not doing that again. And since I've decided I'm going to be stupidly picky, that was the final straw for Drake. I seriously don't mind paying and especially if we switch off. But splitting tabs to the point of a yogurt? No thanks. Ciao.

On Saturday, I went out with my friends Jen and Kat. We went to dinner, met some new people, and then ended up at a party way at the top of Alpine, at this huge house with a huger yard. I ran into people I knew. Problem was, we showed up really late and didn't stick around long enough. Which is beside the point because, really, what was important is that I'm out and about, meeting new people, and (finally) become connected in the community where I live.

Excuse me, but I go to church for Jesus, not a hookup
...But on Saturday night, Kat, Jen and I met up with several other women who are dating in Mormonville. One of them talked about the single's ward she attends and how her Bishop was counseling adults on how to ask each other out and hopefully get married. I had to steal the conversation. I simply couldn't keep my mouth shut.

"Does anyone but me not think it really odd and inappropriate for a man to be telling adults, most of whom are divorced, in church of all places, how to date and get married? Aren't we in church to learn about Jesus and how to be Christlike, not find a date?"

Sometimes I feel like I've been transplanted to Mars.

And on the Myeloma front
And my best days are typically Fridays, because that's the day I take Dex, my lovely steroid. Except this Friday, I was so incredibly tired. After infusion appointment, I went home and slept. The Dex kicked in around 5pm and at that point, I was wired beyond belief. After my ridiculous date, I picked up Kat, we went and got a burger (yes, I ate my first hamburger in probably two years!), and picked up our daughters who were at a party. Morgan and I laid in bed until 1:30AM talking. On Saturday, I felt like hell. Horrible. I slept, woke up and ran errands, came back and slept some more and literally dragged myself out of bed to go out Saturday night. I really wanted to be social or, trust me, sleeping on the couch with the TV on sounded much more appetizing. Today was my mom's birthday so I got up and have been doing things all day. And, really, all I "want" to do is sleep. I feel like a lazy, weak blob. No muscle tone, no stamina, no energy. Please I hope tomorrow is better.

And summer is over
And tomorrow is the last day of summer because my daughters start school on Tuesday. Morgan has soccer in the morning, Siena and I are going to the Post Office (oh joy) to get her passport renewed, Morgan is getting hair extensions ($$$$), and Siena has open house for school. I am actually cooking tomorrow night and making peach-mango salsa with fresh peaches from my mom's tree. I'm grilling up fish and shrimp, making quinoa with sauteed organic spinach and garlic, and green beans (I have to say, my green beans are pretty fabulous; Morgan can eat piles of them and nothing else for dinner). Maybe I'll even make some fresh peach cobbler. My cobbler rocks. Ok, I haven't really cooked in awhile and maybe I'm looking just a little bit forward to getting back to a routine.