Friday, March 11, 2016

I went for the whole enchilada (almost)

I'm going to use this whole "but I endured a stem cell transplant and spent 25 DAYS in the hospital" excuse for all its worth. The latest... Yesterday, I went for a major pick-me-up. I accompanied my mother to a medical facial spa for a consult. She spent no money but I sure did! Her appointment lasted just minutes so I butted in...

"What can you do for me? I just finished up major chemo and I feel awful. My whole face is falling!" I lamented.

Two ladies studied my face. They had to say the whole "You look great [for your age]"-thing but then they started throwing out all kinds of options.

"Surgery around the eyes to tighten them up," said one.

"No surgery," said I. " I doubt I would even get permission from my oncologist."

"Fillers in the cheekbones would get rid of the hollow look," said the other.

Hollow look? Ugh. Thanks, Dexamethasone (steroid) for taking the fat from around my face away. Some people get Fat Face from Dex. I lost my muscle and padding instead (why Dex couldn't have this same affect with my tummy I'll never know).

"What else? Keep going," I said.

"Botox around the eyes," said one.

"Lip filler," said the other.

They mentioned that the Botox I had the month prior in my forehead was awesome. But what about the rest?

Right... What about the rest?

Cost? I can't even go there. But, hey, I endured. I deserved this. Right?

So I ordered up the whole enchilada. Cheek fillers (should last 18-24 months), Botox around the eyes, and fat lips. The injections HURT. Hey, this is no day at the spa getting a massage and pedi, that's for sure. Lots of topical numbing solutions and pricks and holding onto a pillow placed in my lap for dear life.

And when I was done? Well, today I have major frozen face and you know what? I love the feeling! I hate it when my face feels like it's falling and, since I'm getting used to the feeling of not being able to move my facial muscles, I don't like it when it goes away.

I really didn't think my children or William would notice so I decided to stay silent. I picked up Siena from school and she looked at my funny but said nothing. Oh, there's Morgan. "How was your day?" I asked her, kissing her on the forehead.

"Oh, my gosh! You got your lips done!" she said.

"What? No I didn't," I said.

"Yes you did and... what else did you do to your face?" she asked.


William stopped by my parents' house to pick us up for dinner. As we pulled into the restaurant he said, "Don't think for a minute I don't know where you've been," he said.

"Careful what you say. Don't accuse," I responded.

"You look beautiful the way you were," he said.

Right answer! "But I didn't believe you," I said.

He gave me a huge hug, told me he loved me, and I was perfect. Gosh I love that man.

My eyelashes are finally growing back from the awful chemo when I lost them all. I don't think they're quite long enough yet for eyelash extensions. I haven't decided if I'll do them when they are long enough but I might.

Life is too short. Call me vain but whatever! After 25 days in the hospital, fighting myeloma, and surviving my third stem cell transplant, I deserve it.