Not Shoving "Square" Children Into "Round" Holes

I just got back from Long Beach where I went to my best friend's sister-in-law's memorial. I am so lucky to have such close friends. I really think that few people are blessed with friends like I have in Julie and Shane. We have been through a lot together. I trust them with my life, and the lives of my children. How awesome is that? And as we gathered for Sherri's memorial, it was amazing to be surrounded by so much love. Nothing in my life matters more to me than the relationships I have with others. I am finally, at long last, living the life I always wanted. Surrounded by people I love and trust, traveling, and working on issues I am passionate about (cancer, health and wellness, and survivorship). Cancer sucks. I hate it. I wish I never had to deal with it. But life handed this to me and there have been upsides. I hope to high heaven that those of you who are healthy never need to get a devastating health diagnosis to do the same.

Peace and love,
Lizzy

She May Not Live The Life I Pick For Her. And So What?
By Lizzy Smith
                   

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June 14, 2016

I have learned so much about me and life in general in my grown-up years. I thought I had it all figured out and then - bam! - another Life Lesson hits me smack in the face. I wish I could get a re-do but since I can't, I can try to take my life's learnings and incorporate them into my daily grind. Because if I don't, what's the point?

The latest is this past weekend. I flew to Long Beach for the memorial gathering of my friend who just passed away from ovarian cancer. Over the course of five days, I hung out with people who are like my family. One afternoon, my best friends (who are married) Julie, Shane, two of their daughters and I drove to Huntington Beach and went to a Farmer's Market. There were some very interesting people selling their fruits and veggies, organic herbs, various oils, and services that ranged from acupuncture to hypnotism and everything in between. I talked to one woman who was particularly fascinating, with her long flowing hair and skirt. A free spirt, she was. Well traveled, educated, and living a life that did not include windowless office cubicles and hours sitting in traffic every day (not that there is anything wrong with that!). I envied her. How come she got to travel the globe and live a life I envied and I didn't?

Later that day, Julie and I talked about The Meaning of Life. She and her husband have recently made some super huge life changes, which include selling their house and most of their furniture and downsizing in a ginormous way. Not only did shedding all that "stuff" save them a lot of money, but it also saves them a ton of time taking care of it all.

"When you and Sherri got sick, I realized that I was living a life I didn't want," Julie said. "I want to travel and live. I do not want all the trappings anymore. I don't think I ever did." Julie and I are so similar in this respect (which is why we are best friends)-- we both are on a quest to see the world, as much of it as possible RIGHT NOW. We want to create memories and strengthen relationships. How did I end up so off course for so long?

Expectations. That's why.

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