Marriage, clinical trial and Huffington Post!

Well I have had a rather eventful few days!

1. Marriage!

William and I got married last week! We took five days and, just the two of us, explored this amazing country (and, oh, did the whole married thing). It was super fun. We are having our after-party and wedding photos with children and our closest of friends (which happens to include my former step daughter!) in the beautiful Utah canyons on October 3.



Here is my take on the significance of my marriage.

1. I am capable of being in a fabulous relationship. There is no doubt that William brings out the best in me. I am proud of our relationship; I am proud of the way I behave in this relationships. We have enormous respect for each other and I am so happy to show, by example, my children what a healthy relationship looks like. All those horrible things my ex said about me-- the I was a control freak and a horrible partner-- were simply untrue (I knew they were but sometimes we doubt our sanity when we live in a world of craziness, abuse, and chaos.). 
2. Many people who have horrible things happen to them, like getting a cancer diagnosis, give up and just survive. But I am here to tell you that it is possible to thrive even under tough circumstances. It is rarely easy but it is a choice we can make. When I was diagnosed with cancer, my entire life as I knew it fell apart. Literally vanished "just like that." The type of life I was living was supposed to end-- my life was pure HELL and I had to do something radically different. Cancer forced me to do just that. And so, literally, we can decide at ANY AGE to reverse course. We can make a totally different life, with new priorities and zest at any time, no matter what. It can be hard and frightening, but the rewards are infinite.
3. It is truly amazing to find a fabulous partner. When you have each other's backs, well-- there is nothing like it.

...Now the sad part. My 15 year old daughter was devastated that we did the marriage portion in private. She wanted to be part of it, she had a rough week, and I was not there for her. I was mostly out of cell phone range. I missed my daughters horribly those five days we were gone and my daughter needed me. And I needed her. That part was not good. I hope she forgives me and gets distracted in her new life. Or, perhaps, we will have a lovely commitment ceremony amidst the changing leaves on October 3. New season, new time of life. I like it.

2. Clinical Trial (or "I'm no guinea pig!")

Today I am sitting in clinic at Huntsman Cancer Institute for like eight hours! I have embarked on my first-ever clinical study. I am super excited about it, and hopeful. We patients MUST get into clinical trials. I am gaining access to a drug that only those of us in this trial can get into.

I am doing this one:

CLINICAL TRIAL: ACY-1215 in Combination With Pomalidomide and Low-dose Dex in Relapsed-and-Refractory Multiple Myeloma

What is the purpose of this trial?

Phase 1b: To evaluate the side effects and determine the best dose of ACY-1215 in combination with Pomalidomide and low-dose dexamethasone in patients with relapsed-and-refractory multiple myeloma. Phase 2: To determine the overall response rate of ACY-1215 in combination with Pomolidomide and low-dose dexamethasone in patients with relapsed-and-refractory multiple myeloma.

Wish me luck! And if you are the praying type, please include me (and all the other amazing cancer warriors out there).  Oh, and I will write more about this as time progresses.

3. I am featured in Huffington Post today!

I'm super excited! I posted a portion of my article a few days ago (which originally published on Divorced Moms) but in case you missed it, I'm reposting a part of it again right here.

12 Signs You're In An Unhealthy Relationship

Posted: 09/21/2015 11:55 am EDT Updated: 9 minutes ago

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By Lizzy Smilez for DivorcedMoms.com

There are pretty much universal signs that you are in an unhealthy relationship. If this sounds like yours, it is time to make some huge changes. Perhaps therapy is in order and your relationship is fixable. And in some cases, the only way to save yourself is by leaving it.

1. He is an addict.

If your partner is an addict, you cannot fix him. You must leave if you ever want peace or joy in your life. Some women develop an unhealthy love of the drama that life with an addict brings. Other women are co-dependent and "enjoy" repeated attempts to fix and care for their sick partner. Regardless, if you want a healthy relationship yet are with an addict, it is time get therapy, get strong and get out. There is no other option if you ever hope for joy, peace and love in your life.

Keep reading.... 

Blessings, my awesome readers!

Lizzy